So we've been home two days now and so far so completely good. Benji is the best little helper and James is the sweetest little guy. He wakes up only to eat and when he messes his diaper, for the most part anyway. He is such a good little guy and Benji and Dave have really stepped up in their roles as big brother and dad and husband. I feel like I can actually do this now. Plus I feel fabulous. I'm overdoing a little bit and I'm trying to keep a good balance without overexerting myself. I mean I only had a baby 3 days ago, but honestly I feel really good. I have been really blessed.
So this whole pregnancy I have been wanting to try one more time for a little girl, but yesterday the thoughts and feelings that kept coming back to me were that I am done. My family is complete and it feels really good. I have great peace in it, which is totally weird to me, it's something I know I'll never be able to explain properly, but I'm content with my life and I feel like I can make it. I'm happy with my three boys, plus I get to be the only girl still, which is a role I have always enjoyed in my family. I must say I enjoy being one of the guys and also being completely spoiled because I am the only girl. It's a role I'm not willing to give up. Well I better get to bed, I'm going to be up again in an hour or two to feed James. Thanks for all the well wishes. It means a lot. We love you.
Heidi