Saturday, July 14, 2012

One Week Ago

One week ago my prayer was answered only not the one I really expected. One week ago I was several days late. I had been extremely tired, exhausted really. I thought my medicine had quit working. I had just been feeling terrible and now I was late. It's hard to explain what exactly was going through my head, but I can say that I knew somewhere deep down that it wasn't the right time, but a girl can always hope. I laid around all day, and sometime after noon I had really extreme cramps. I knew what was coming. And although a girl can always hold out hope I had a new hope an assurance of when the time IS right, everything will work out, without medicine, without clomid, without anything. And that's when I knew that God hears our prayers and He really does care and He really does love me. I have been asking for some time now to know when it would be right to start fertility treatments again. I have not lost the 50 pounds I set out to lose but I had lost 21 in the last year, although because of this experience I had gained back 6 in a matter of a week and it has not seen fit to let go yet. Through this somewhat painful experience I know that I am not as broken as I thought I was and there is a sure hope that when the time is really right for us to welcome a new person into our home it will happen in the Lord's time, the right time. And in the meantime I will continue to try and lose weight and eat healthy and enjoy my family.